Hello – I joined the forum yesterday and am making my first post today.
I have attended FPU two times, graduated twice (2000 and 2007), read numerous other books on money management (Burkette, Dayton, Blue, McCoy, Hunt, Dacyzyn, etc., etc.) and have yet to be able to successfully become debt free.
I know I have a problem with telling my kids no — but I say yes to little things in a lot of respects – a CD here or a new shirt there.
We don’t get regular haircuts and rarely go to the movie theater.
I have spent money on pets over the years and now confess one pet is enough.
I’ve been married 19 1/2 years and during that time we’ve only been on one real vacation ever.
It seems like we’ve been fighting fires our entire marriage and have never managed to get our emergency fund in place.
It’s nearly impossible for my dh and me to sit and talk about money for more than 20 minutes straight.
We’ve never been able to have the family meetings others seem to have.
It’s either one, or the other of us, handling the money.
We can come together and talk about things theoretically – which is what I think the class was — more discussion of theory than focusing on our literal application.
Our oldest child starts college this month and I’ve peeked at a few of the recent college posts.
All her tuition is paid for with scholarships and the room & board is all coming from student loans (GSL and Parent Plus).
I know we said we’d not accrue new debt but I agree that you can’t compete without the education and the scholarships totally hinge on keeping up the GPA; so doing well in school is the only option.
Either she gets A’s & B’s, or she doesn’t go.
I have finally found a free software tool online that shows me *when* all our debts will be paid and it could be done (everything except 1 car) within about 18-24 months.
My dilemma is that we always end up with more medical bills then we can handle, new & big ones seem to accrue every twelve months or so.
And the other dilemma is that the lack of an emergency fund keeps us gaining new debt.
My most urgent need and info I need is – How have people living paycheck to paycheck managed to get their emergency fund? Working another job, selling one more household item, or having another garage sale isn’t gonna cut it.
We’ve been there and done that.
It’s gonna have to come from money we earn and I think I’m gonna have to open a savings account and put money there.
What percentage of your take home do you apply to gaining the emergency fund and how much time is reasonable to say we’ll have $1000 by such and such.
Honestly, I’ve not had $1000 in the bank hardly ever Thanks for any advice about the emergency fund.
Linda

I don’t agree that everyone can ‘realistically cut’ $1000 from their budget in 1 or 2 months.
From personal experience, I know it’s often difficult to cut even $200 per month..
But I agree that a combination of selling stuff, cutting expenses, and more income is the best way to do it.
Eldred — Sometimes I wonder, “Why is that Frisbee getting bigger?”…and then it hits me.

Similar to what Eldred said, you have to want it.
You have to want to change.
You also have to have the discipline to it.
It’s not all head knowledge–which is good to have, but you have to be able to follow through and that means changing behavior.
If what you’ve been doing hasn’t been working (which you already know it hasn’t been), then you know something needs to change.
It’s just that YOU need to make the change and YOU need to stick with it.
It sounds like you’re close to being there.
This isn’t going to be a quick and easy path.
Change isn’t easy.
Sounds like what you need is a plan.
So let’s start with basic things.
Do you have a budget? Is it written down? Do you stick to your budget? Let’s assume it’s a yes.
Go through each and every line very, very carefully.
Is the dollar amount assigned to that category necessary or nice? Can you shave off just $10 in various categories? How much are impulse buys? Be completely honest.
Be brutally honest.
Be so honest that you’ll make yourself cry.
If it’s a matter of discipline, try this.
Figure out what you have left in a month after necessary expenditures.
Then before you do anything else, take that amount and put it straight into a separate savings account that is labeled Emergency Fund (which you said somewhere in your post that you know you need to do).
Then you will be forced to keep to your budget because you will have absolutely zero wiggle room.
You may only be able to put $50 in the bank a month towards the emergency fund.
Baby steps are still steps.
Every dollar needs a name.
Every dollar needs to keep its name and not have identity crisis’ by “needing” things like a new CD or a shirt.
As for your kids, do you give them opportunities to earn commission? They can pay for their own shirts and CDs and toys–the unnecessary but nice stuff.
And hey, if they can’t pay for it, they can’t afford it.
Something magical happens when you are firm with yourself and with those around you.
You have the smarts.
Now just do it! Suki p.s.
If you need someone to bounce ideas off of or to just vent or celebrate or just need encourage, you can always email me.

Welcome Angela! I’ll bet that was an unforgettable time, getting to know Dave and his family and watching him do the show.
Congratulations on getting through those first baby steps, and I hope the teaching goes well.
Best wishes also on the birth of your baby.
I hope you enjoy this forum as much as I do.
Original Message

Hello,   I’m Roxanne from northern California and am new to the forum, and have just purchased The TMM book that is on its way.
I have 3 credit cards with just a bit less than $8,000 on them combined, and a credit line through my bank that is just over $9,000.
The plan is to eliminate the cc’s first by cutting them up, and then the debt on them starting with the smallest and working up.
Not sure how long it will take but I’m going to do it! Then re-evaluate and go from there to eliminate the rest, including my mortgage!   Thank you for having this forum.
      Roxanne